Cease and desist?
A hot guy friend thinks I'm on my way to acquiring a fatal flaw.
...like you can have only one!...
Somehow he's got the notion that by the end of 100 First Dates I'm going to turn into Emily Dickinson. My first reaction was "Sweet! I'll get some serious royalties!" Until he reminded me of the complete isolation and the probability of lots of cats.... "Ummmm, ok... not so much..."
Maybe there's something to it though. I was thinking about the concepts of protection and defensiveness last night. I'm definitely more protective of myself than I used to be. I've got a candy coating now that I didn't have before. I used to just melt right in your hand. Messy.
I haven't been feeling much of anything lately. Perhaps because I'm working so much. Perhaps it's because with the kind of volume involved in 100 First Dates, I cut out the emotional middleman and pass the savings onto YOU! 
I have been a bit concerned lately that I might be evolving into an emotional robot. J (the nice guy who lingers on) cancelled our date on Wednesday due to a schedule conflict, so when D (whom I haven't gone out with since sometime in December)continued to pester me for a date I finally agreed to see him again. It was really nice. Very comfortable. Very generic. Very hollow.
Seriously though, maybe he's onto something here though; I have to give this some serious thought. I hadn't really ever considered that going on 100 First Dates might be damaging me.
The alternative might be finally finishing all my home improvement projects and inviting Better Homes and Gardens over for the photo spread. Or getting back to my vocal projects or other artistic endeavors.
What do you think? I'm only 1/5 of the way done.
posted by Master Dater @ 12:34 PM
1 Comments:
At 9:49 PM,
Anonymous said…
Hi MD.
Back with you today to read all your great blogs.
I must say i like the idea that you have developed a coating that keeps you from getting hurt so easily and allows you to give yourself the belief that one must earn your trust. I am feeling so completely shattered after my asshole of an ex boyfriend has left me so screwed up annalysing our whole blooy relationship. I feel the only way to get over this is to be completely angry with him for using me the way he did, but another part of me doubts that he realised how he was hurting me and does have some kind of a soul. I have heard that anger inside yourself though can cause cancer- another thing i am so worried about getting- completely paranoid of everything.
No i think you should completely keep going- if not for all your readers benefit :-) I think you are on your way to becoming a completely powerful woman that doesn't need a man to do anything, has complete independense and only accepts someone treating you the best. Of course you will have trouble communicating with many people if you continue this because alot of people are not willing to do such a project to grow so much as a person. What you are doing is completely brave and you are facing all your fears. There are many girls, whether from thier bleifs growing up or the evolutionary gender role that women have taken on except the fact and do think that women are hear to serve men and men are here to provide and protect- it's not an easy thing you are coming up against here and many females won't understand or agree with you! And if your friend is a male that is telling you this- well it explains itself that he is petrified that strong women like yourself are taking a stand and not putting up with their bullshit anymore.
I think definately keep going, don't let other's doubts become your doubts MD.
Regards, A
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