Date 89 - He's a Very Kinky Girl

originally posted Saturday, October 29, 2005

JM found me online and we starting chatting earlier this week. That's not my style, but lo and behold, he was actually interesting. Intelligent, irreverent, funny. He's college educated, a successful professional and he volunteers on a regular basis. We're actually the same age, which is a refreshing treat.

I talked on the phone with him using the *67 feature to cloak my true identity (being a super hero can really be a bitch sometimes). We were on the phone for an insanely long junior high school amount of time. If my mom was here, I would have been grounded. We were on the phone AND on the computer. Could it possibly have been more geeky? At least we were discussing art and I was able to find images of the obscure triptych that he claimed was his favorite work. We were also making fun of other online dating profiles and trying to figure out why our compatibility score wasn't higher since crazy churchy cat ladies were outranking me. (Turns out my height requirement screened him right out... poor baby.)

I was taking a break from dating this week since I'm pretty badly injured at the moment. Cortizone shot in the hip yesterday, and now in addition to the pain killers, I'm on steroids. I expect the next few posts to contain an unusual amount of anger as a result. I might issue a blanket challenge for arm wrestling too. Any takers?! Bring it on!!!!

I clearly wouldn't be attending any of the fabulous Halloween parties that were on my calendar this weekend, so when he twisted my arm to meet him for a drink it wasn't hard to agree. Curiosity was getting the better of both of us and I think we both looked forward to returning to our regularly scheduled programs.

We were supposed to meet at NXNW, but then his coworkers converged on the place and I got a somewhat frantic phone call asking for a change in venue... the Cheesecake Factory instead. (sigh) Parking would be a bitch, which meant walking which I'm not supposed to be doing... but I agreed. I prayed for parking and lucked out with a relatively close spot.

(After the date, my hell-phone finally sent me his voicemail asking me to just drive up to the restaurant so he could park my car for me. That was thoughtful... if only the hell-phone would have let me know earlier.)

I saw him as I was hobbling out of the car. Talking on his cell phone. I hoped my slow and limping approach would give him the requisite time to conclude his call. No luck. By the time I got to him, he was still yacking. (It should be noted that cell phones are my number 2 pet peeve -- after the new number 1 pet peeve of being humiliated into paying for my own putt-putt.)

He wrapped up his call and shook my hand. A hand shake. Not even a fully legitimate handshake...but a kind of sideways handshake. This did NOT bode well. He was actually his stated height of 5'10" - not as tall as I would like, but a respectable height and he was just as cute as his photos.

We went inside, and he graciously got us the closest available table in the bar to minimize my walking. We ordered some cocktails and my gaydar started to beep. Not loudly... but enough to warrant a raised eyebrow. I had a raspberry martini and he ordered a froo-froo drink too. It takes a secure man to admit he's a girl-drink-drunk, but as our conversation progressed there were other oddities too as he told me some funny stories from his college days. Given his other proclivities (some of which he revealed during our phone call) I was really not expecting this from him. He was increasingly reminding me of my friend Dave from high school who had a wicked crush on me during our college years and shortly thereafter announced he was gay.

He's an interesting guy with some great stories. He fancies himself Val Kilmer from the movie 'Real Genius'. There are some shades of "the snake" in him; he shares some of the same quirks. Because of that, part of me wants to run far, far away -- not likely given the current condition of the hip. The other part of me wants to give him a real chance. I had it bad for "the snake" and he was never worthy of it... but this guy doesn't seem as hollow. Although he does seem just a tad robotic, there doesn't appear to be a 'this space for rent' sign where his soul should be.

He's a bit hard to read and I wasn't sure he was enjoying himself. I was amazed he wanted to continue the date. We went to the adjacent bookstore and got a table in their little coffee area so we could people-watch and chat more: real estate, suburbia and commutes. Easy random conversation until we were both fading... I hobbled back to my car. He gave me a small quick hug and we went our separate ways.