Found and Lost

I made some minor progress on the home renovations this week. I feel like I've finally found my groove again and I'm getting back to being myself.

A wonderful friend helped me out hanging some new blinds and while other people were out partying this weekend, I was doing the tape and float routine on a stepladder in the guestbath. Nothing says "party girl" like doing drywall on a Saturday night. ...and I actually turned down a date for that!

My flamboyant new shower curtain from the bastards at Pottery Barn arrived this week. I don't know why I have such a strange affinity for paisley, but I'm motivated now! I can visualize the final product and I want to have this stuff done before I start the new job next month!!! I think I might finally be willing to just pay someone to finish. Afterall, I've gotten this far without any severed limbs or digits, so why tempt fate?

A friend called me around lunchtime on Sunday to invite me out on the boat. I'm NEVER available for him... always busy, but for once his timing was just perfect. I'd already done my chores, perused my periodicals, passed them on to the recycling bin and was ready for some relaxation. I figured since I'm headed to Mexico next week, I'd better start training. You can't just go from 100mph to full stop without changing gears. You've got to downshift!

Bathing suit... hair in pigtails... straw hat... my beloved expensive Austrian shades... I was ready to roll. We had a wonderful time out on the lake. It was hot enough outside that the water was invigorating but still refreshing. We finally had our fill then just before we were headed back to the marina my hat went airborne and landed in the water. I ripped off my coverup Baywatch style and dove in after it (forgetting that my ultra lightweight sunglasses were still on). As I swam back to the boat, salvaged hat in hand, I felt the bridge of the glasses give way and one half slowly drift down to the murky bottom.

*sigh* My mother was right... I can't have nice things. On the upside, should I lose an eye doing home repair, I've got the pirate shades ready to go!

Date 78 - Wedding Crashers

D and I have known each other for about 2 years now. A true South Austinite, my awesome, sensitive pony-tailed friend is always up for completely random cultural experiences (art, music, theater, etc.). When he received the wedding invitation from our former bandmate, we joked about who would be his escort and decided it would be great fun to bring me as a mystery guest. He RSVP'ed "plus one" with my nom de plume and we got a good chuckle out of it.

Since some more organized wedding guests had already purchased the requisite toaster oven, I got stuck hunting down random registry items for the happy couple at Target. I loaded a good assortment of housewares into my cart, drove home and put together a gift-wrapped tower worthy of Martha Stewart herself.

When D showed up at my door I thought he was pulling another prank. I had gotten gussied up in a respectable blue dress and pearls but he showed up wearing an oversize shiny jacket circa 1986 and a faded black t-shirt. As much as I adore D, he has always had a problem with ill fitting clothes. If I didn't know better, I'd swear he was Jarred from Subway and just never got around to purchasing a new wardrobe.

D marveled at the professional gift wrap job, signed the card and we drove out to Georgetown. By the time we got there the blended multi-culti ceremony was already underway. The bride is Sri Lankan, the groom is Kansan (or something equally white bred.) We quickly and quietly took seats on the outside edge and listened to the chanting and singing.

When the ceremony was over, some of his friends came over to say hello. I've had lunch with them before but didn't immediately recognize them. One of them is now a Googler in NY, and brought his equally Googley NY girlfriend. The other had his fiancee in from Maryland where she's in a PhD program. They're all a few years younger than me.

I like these guys. They're really fun but impressive, they're not. In fact, with the exception of D they're actually kind of jerky. Which is why I never got involved with their counterparts when I was their age. I wasn't impressed then, and I'm still not impressed.

It got me thinking though...
Is this what I was supposed to be doing at their age?
Their girlfriends seem devoted; like they've made an investment and intend to squeeze a return out of it no matter what. They will tame these beasts. It's all a bit tragic to me.

But not as tragic as the open bar...
Rum & Coke, white wine, lemon drops, champagne, sea breeze. Oh, the humanity! Thankfully I managed to keep myself pretty well together until the after party, at which point I promptly nodded off. Not the best showing on my part, but it could have been far worse.

Thankfully D was his usual wonderful self and got me home safe and sound.
...and I only got one mocking email from him the next day.

It's All Who Ya Know

On my way home from the gym last night, I rang up S. He's an intrepid world traveler and very hard to reach. It's been at least a month since I handed over the big final consulting deliverable to the high muckety mucks and I've yet to hear a peep back from them. I'm still hoping this could lead to my dream job someday.

I know he's got bigger fish to fry with his insane travel schedule. Lately I've been distracted with personal matters, so it hasn't been that pressing for me but I figured I might as well stir the pot to find out if there's the potential for further work, or if this is "done and done".

Lo and behold, he was actually IN the States... and in Austin! He was having drinks with his peeps at the Cedar Door. I hopped in the shower and hightailed it downtown in time to see them crossing the street "Beatles-style" to Manuel's for dinner as I hunted a parking spot. My cell phone rang a few moments later to inquire about my drink preference. Nice!

His friends are great. Smart, savvy, fit, and funny. Married. One of them clearly has a crush on him. Who doesn't? Hell, I do too... although the sideburns aren't helping him much these days. The first time we met I got the weirdest vibe from her. Like I was competition. Doesn't matter that she's married, she cornered me in the ladies room to secure the story of my friendship with him. How long had we known each other? Did we work together? How did we meet? Ad nauseum.... She must have decided quickly that I was no threat. She's been super perky to me ever since.

These are people that you'd just naturally expect to be snotty, and somehow, suprisingly, they're not. I'd feel snubbed if they didn't completely embrace me the way they do. One of the girl's gave me the best compliment as we left the restaurant... something about how well I fit in with them and how they'd love to have me meet the rest of the group.

I don't know why that should mean so much, but it does. Maybe because I work with mostly men... mostly over 50...mostly in a very structured environment. Maybe it's all the crappy job interviews lately. I don't care... I'm taking that deposit to my self esteem account at Ego National Bank.

And in unrelated news... my good karma continues as my awesome friend Jace Toronto gifted me with a 300 song iTunes sampler from SXSW XX. That'll be a great addition to my Tron phone! God bless my groovy and diverse group of friends!

I love you all!

The Bitch is Back!

I'm finally back from Flahdeeda and not a moment too soon! Those people drive me crazy! If you think Austin drivers are bad, go to South Florida for a reality check. You can play Bad Driver Bingo!

Mark one spot every time you see:

• the perpetual turn signal

• someone doing 35 mph in the fast lane

• someone backing up in a parking lot without any regard for immediate surroundings or pedestrians

• a little old lady peering precariously through the steering wheel and over the dashboard (bonus points if it's a little old man! extra bonus points if they are sitting on a phone book!)

It wasn't all bad though. I managed to get most of the family's immediate legal concerns taken care of, so that's off my mind now, and I got to meet the new baby.

She was delightful. The teeniest little thing. It's hard to believe she's 3 months old and still less than 10 lbs. If she keeps this up, she'll be a supermodel for sure... or maybe just a midget.

I changed a few diapers complete with nuclear poo and fed her numerous times. She fell asleep in my arms too many times to count. She'd get so relaxed that she'd fall fast asleep while eating. I can't ever remember being so relaxed that I fell asleep in my food.

Face down in a plate of pasta... I like the sound of that. It has a slight Costanza ring to it... remember this whole food and sex angle? This isn't so far off the mark.

The dog seems happy to be back home. I missed her like crazy. She HATES going to the kennel, but I think she forgets about me 5 minutes after I'm gone. So many things to smell and other dogs to herd. I try not to let the guilt get to me.

Yesterday was a whirlwind of activity between trying to catch up on a week's worth of email and having a job interview at Crooked E Corp. In an absurd turn of events, the final person on my agenda never showed up and I was stuck in a small room by myself for about an hour.

I really thought it was some kind of psychological warfare and part of the interview process. At least I got all the "talking points" of my thank you notes outlined while I called all the numbers I had, trying to get an HR person to come rescue me so I could "legally" walk out of the building.

No luck.

Finally, I peeked out and stomped around cubeville for a few miles trying to find someone to help me. I actually succeeded in locating the AWOL HR rep's cube, only to be told by her neighbor that she just left. Perfect. If I didn't want the job before, I DEFINITELY do now.
You had me at "ignore"!

Since I was already suited up in my corporate finery, I decided to wind down with a couple of cosmos at Truluck's. Between that and a house call from my devoted massage therapist, it did the trick... and today is a better day.

NutraSweet

It's the first weekend in ages that I wasn't stuck working. I went to a birthday happy hour on Friday night, took in a new flick and caught up with some friends at a local watering hole. Saturday morning I hit the gym and used the rest of the day to catch up on much neglected domestic chores like scaling Mt. Laundry and doing a little Mr. Miagi action on my convertible. (Finally paid for, thanks to all the freelance work!)

Spring is in the air and my hard work was rewarded with a wonderful and relaxing Sunday. I took the dog for her usual morning jaunt to catch up on p-mail while I listened to mp3s on my groovy new cell phone. It's such a luxury to finally have a phone that works!

I called him from the park to see if he was up for breakfast. He's like a favorite pair of sweatpants that you've had since college. Comfortable, dependable, broken in and soft against the skin. Not quite pants, not quite pajamas. Somewhere in between. He's like a boyfriend stunt double.

He's NutraSweet. I know it's not real sugar, but it still tastes just as sweet. As an ex, he's familiar with the territory and knows his way around. He's a good guy and a good friend. I still love him, but not in the way I did before. It's a different kind of love. Phil Collins might call it a "groovy kind of love".

He knows all my scars and for the most part treats them with care and the delicacy of a parent who kisses a "boo-boo" when a child skins a knee. I try to reciprocate when I can. There's a comfort in knowing him and having the history we do, but also knowing that we'll never be anything beyond what we are right now... and that when one of us becomes involved, even this will change. That will be sad and I know that day is just around the corner.

As we brunched, I was delighted to find a marachino cherry in the bottom of my mimosa glass. It was going to be a good day! Two or three more mimosas guaranteed it. A nap, a foot massage and a shower before we were off to run some errands in the convertible, enjoying the breeze and lush new ear candy in the CD player.

We took the long way home.

I sang most of the way.